29 May 2008
27 May 2008
15 May 2008
09 May 2008
Y Rheng Byddwn
Welsh for "The Row of I Would," inspired by a line of girls I saw the other day, all in their summery low-cut top glory.
06 May 2008
Dirty English Whores
Inspired by my friend's flatmate, whom I am convinced is the one who gave her ring worm (never mind that my friend works with children).
24 April 2008
16 April 2008
Bad Luck Steve
Inspired by the strange tone of disdain used by Dermot Murnaghan on "Eggheads" when he was consoling a contestant.
27 March 2008
The Joyful Deaths of Several Young Children
Taken from the utterly-strange-but-true title of a 17th century children's book: "A Token for Children: Being an Exact Account of the Conversion, Holy and Exemplary Lives, and Joyful Deaths, of Several Young Children" by James Janeway (1671)
30 January 2008
28 January 2008
19 December 2007
09 December 2007
Transdimensional Porch Swing
Inspired by a dream Heather had about me in which she was travelling through time on a porch swing and my father was Hulk Hogan.
20 November 2007
03 August 2007
Bladder Tap
Suggested by Eric, who said the name came to him as he was driving his dog home from the vet.
28 July 2007
13 July 2007
08 July 2007
29 June 2007
Dirty Waves
Inspired by a story of Sara Huws' former roomate who, amid coming off some kind of a drug high, became convinced that his brain was being infected by "dirty waves" caused by another roomate's using their WiFi connection to access porn.
22 June 2007
09 June 2007
27 May 2007
Stupid Hamster
Inspired by a conversation with Chris' friend, who suggested that a hamster unable to identify the choking hazard inherent to Legos probably doesn't deserve to live.
25 April 2007
22 March 2007
15 March 2007
12 March 2007
Chwarter i Nawr
Suggested by one of my professors, who said it would make a good name for an album. Translated from Welsh it means "Quarter to Now." It sounds like it would be a Van Morrison follow-up album to "Inarticulate Speech of the Heart."
07 March 2007
14 February 2007
12 February 2007
Los ASBOs
Inspired by a comment someone made in my Spanish class.
(ASBO stands for Anti-Social Behaviour Order)
(ASBO stands for Anti-Social Behaviour Order)
23 January 2007
21 January 2007
16 January 2007
11 January 2007
12 November 2006
Cystitis Overturn
Suggested by Rhys, who got the idea from a failure by Welsh government types to understand Welsh.
08 November 2006
07 November 2006
25 October 2006
19 October 2006
06 October 2006
27 September 2006
02 September 2006
01 September 2006
13 August 2006
09 August 2006
07 July 2006
22 June 2006
The Suck Kings
Inspired by the U.S. soccer team's performance (or lack thereof) in the 2006 World Cup.
17 June 2006
16 June 2006
15 June 2006
01 June 2006
23 May 2006
15 May 2006
08 May 2006
04 May 2006
02 May 2006
19 April 2006
18 April 2006
14 April 2006
11 April 2006
10 April 2006
04 April 2006
30 March 2006
28 March 2006
10 March 2006
08 March 2006
06 March 2006
28 February 2006
24 February 2006
23 February 2006
17 February 2006
16 February 2006
8 Ounces Of Me
Inspired by the fact that it is possible to make jewelry using 8 ounces of cremated remains.
15 February 2006
14 February 2006
Throwing Chinese Women
Inspired by the way in which Chinese figure skater Zhang Hao reared back and tossed Zhang Dan across the ice like a sack of potatoes in their 2006 silver-medal performance.
13 February 2006
10 February 2006
09 February 2006
06 February 2006
02 February 2006
01 February 2006
31 January 2006
28 January 2006
23 January 2006
20 January 2006
19 January 2006
17 January 2006
Butt-Bandit Cowboys
Inspired by my co-worker's politically incorrect description of "Brokeback Mountain."
16 January 2006
The Quartormemes
Inspired by the French habit of quickly bringing in a 14th guest if a dinner party has 13 guests.
13 January 2006
12 January 2006
10 January 2006
09 January 2006
05 January 2006
04 January 2006
03 January 2006
30 December 2005
29 December 2005
22 December 2005
21 December 2005
20 December 2005
19 December 2005
Nipple Reconstruction
Inspired by use of the phrase in a health story about using a fat from a woman's ass to give her bigger breasts.
18 December 2005
09 December 2005
08 December 2005
Mwnci Bach Drwg
Welsh for "Naughty Little Monkey," it is inspired by a song that is currently one of my favorites.
07 December 2005
The Provo Incident
Inspired by the time I was walking in Provo, Utah, and a guy leaned out the window of a passing car and screamed "Hey man, fuck you!"
Strangely, he did not appear to be screaming at me. I think he was directing his anger toward Provo in general.
Strangely, he did not appear to be screaming at me. I think he was directing his anger toward Provo in general.
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